A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

The next day, there’s a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, ‘If you can catch me, you can have me.’

Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there’s a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, ‘If you catch me you can have me’.

Well, he’s out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.
Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.
‘Are you sure?’ asks the representative on the phone. ‘This is our most rigorous program.’

‘Absolutely,’ he replies, ‘I haven’t felt this good in years.’

The next day there’s a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink  running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, ‘If I catch you, your ass is mine.’

He lost 63 pounds that week.

I’m nearly out of sessions with my personal trainer. I already re-upped once, but I can’t justify re-upping again. It’s a lot of money and I need to get to the point where I’m at the gym regardless of whether I have an appointment with a trainer.

A lot of people thought I was crazy for paying a personal trainer, but I think it was worth it. I learned a lot about how *my* body works – the poor condition of my knees, for example, which my trainer was able to specifically address. I also learned proper form – many gym rats that look like they’re working hard are actually doing the exercises wrong. (One fellow turned every exercise into a back exercise).

Of course the timing couldn’t be any more challenging. This time of year isn’t optimal for starting good habits with all the Christmas partying going around. But I haven’t been invited to any parties and I figure if I can get it going now then I’ll be in a good zone as the year rolls over.

For now, I’m focusing on just showing up and doing some cardio. I did a half hour of cardio last night after work and another first this morning; I’ll do another tonight after work.

The goal is to do cardio five mornings a week and weight training four nights a week, based on the recommendation of my trainer – I’m not a morning person, so if I can drag my butt onto a machine in the morning and just get started, I’m more likely to succeed.

I have a few sessions left so I’ll have a few after Christmas. Hopefully that will get me into the zone in 2010, especially after a week of lazing around with the family for Christmas in the middle of nowhere.